Monday, 9 May 2016
My First Month On Sertraline
As i have been prescribed Sertraline,i thought it may be helpful to document my first month on the meds.I have been diagnosed with severe depression while also having anxiety disorders and a mild OCD that does tend to wear me down even further.I do understand that every medication can affect each individual differently. Even if it is of interest to 1 person,i will be very happy so what i will try and do is tell you how i feel on a daily basis. I take one tablet a day in the morning after breakfast.
Day 1- Felt absolutely no difference whatsoever but i found it very difficult to sleep that night.
Day 2- OMG the tiredness i feel is like nothing i have ever felt before in my life. I took the tablet thismorning and it is now 6.30pm and i am exhausted and need my bed i am that tired. I also have felt very hungry all day and even shortly after eating,i feel like i want to eat more.
Day 3- Today has been a strange day in which i have felt a very strong feeling of not trusting my boyfriend. This has not happened me before and practically all day i have felt that he is having an affair with a co worker of his. I have also felt quite hungry all day.
Day 4- Again i have felt hungry all day and still have this feeling of not trusting my BF even though i know that i have absolutely nothing to be worried about.
Day 5- All i can say about today is that Sertraline seems to take my mind off some problems and concerns but seems to then create others. I have a strong feeling of paranoia but it is at this stage too difficult to explain.
Day 6- Today is not a good day at all,i feel rubbish and dont want to talk to anyone. I have spent the day avoiding people and turned off my phone.
Day 7- I feel exactly the same as i did before i started on sertraline,i am now having my doubts as to whether these are going to work for me or whether i will have to try a different anti-dep!
Day 8- After a terrible night's sleep in which my mind was going a mile a minute thinking all sorts,i actually believe that these tablets are having absolutely no affect on me at all!
Day 9- These are definately not working at all,i still feel crap,i am not eating as much however.
Day 10- Feelings of i just want to be on my own today. I have turned my phone off and even while i am on twitter,i have no inclination to talk to anyone at all. My friend has been trying to contact me and she has even sent me a private message on fb but as i have not actually clicked on the msg,she has no idea that i have seen it so i will leave it at that so!
Day 11- today is the worst i have felt in a long time,i actually feel worse than i did before i started on these meds. I feel totally unmotivated to do anything and still dont want to talk to anyone.
Day 12- i really dont think these are working at all,i still feel totally crap. I seem to have lost interest in alot of things that had previously kept me happy. I was told by my gp to give them time and i guess i will do but so far,i am very disappointed that i dont feel any better at all!
Day 13- i have absolutely no motivation at all to do anything and i have so much that i have to do. I feel like i just could not be bothered and some of the things i need to do are important.
Day 14- 2 weeks in now and i still feel crap. Today i fely very unhappy with my body and have been wondering all day why my bf is interested in me at all. I can honestly say at this stage that these tablets are not working for me and i am very frustrated at this moment in time.
Day 15- for some reason,today was a good day. Maybe it has nothing to do with the tablets as i have had good days before them but who knows. I still think at this stage,i have every intention to change to different meds at the end of the month,this is my plan.
Day 16- still feel crap and very unmotivated. 16 days in now and i havn't had a decent night's sleep in so long and even writing this,it is now 2.45 am. I should mention that the feeling that my bf is having an affair has passed thank God as deep down i knew it was something that would never happen. The meds seemed to give me trust issues for a period of time.
Day 17- another day in which i feel the exact same as i did before i started and sometimes even worse. I cant wait to see out this month and i can go back to my gp. This is so frustrating as i want to feel better in myself and then hopefully go on to enjoy life.
Day 18- i feel totally unmotivated today and have had lots to do but actually getting around to doing anything was a real effort. Also felt very tired all day too. Also what i have noticed is that some people who i would call friends no longer talk to me,coincidently since i shared my first post about having depression and starting on meds. I am still the same person and am not like a fragile doll.
Day 19- another rubbish day in which i am certain that i am wasting my time taking these tablets. I had alot to do today but got everything done but felt under pressure all day.
Day 20- yet another day in which i felt pretty awful and negative practically all day,also felt very tired for most of the day too.
Day 21- a positive day for once,thank God. Actually had a really nice day but i doubt that i can put this down to the meds.
Day 22- not a great day,having some serious trust issues and again i feel like paranoia is settling in.I also must mention that my sex drive has diminished in the 3 weeks on sertraline. This is a side effect that i am not happy about.
Day 23- another crap day if truth be known,i did however get out and enjoy the sunshine and even got a little tan but generally i still feel quite down.
Day 24- ah these are just not doing anything at all and i am sick of it at this stage. Anxiety levels are almost at an all time high,i dont want to talk to anyone and if truth be known,i actually feel worse than i did before i started these. It is so annoying and frustrating!
Day 25-27- nothing changed at all,still feel rubbish,feel very unmotivated,tired and generally feel negative about everything.
Day 28- i went back to see my GP yesterday and explained everything to him and the fact that i dont think the tabs have done anything at all for me,that i still feel as bad as ever with no motivation,no positivity,wanting to be on my own and generally not enjoying life at all. He has suggested counselling but this is something that i am not interested in doing. He has upped my doseage of "sertraline" from 50mg to 100mg and said i should try this for a further month. To say i am surprised is an understatement as they have done nothing for me. Today i feel worse than ever but have started on the 100mg thismorning.
I hope this post may be of some help to someone out there and thank you to anyone who has taken the time to read it,