Wednesday, 27 July 2016

Looking For Advice #Relationship Issue

This is a different post for me to my usual but i am hoping for some advice on what has happened.

As some of you may know, i was once married but my husband cheated on me with a good friend of mine and it was the end of our marriage. I struggled for years and eventually in April i started anti-depressants for the first time. A certain amount of paranoia can be associated with taking these though.

So this is the situation guys and girls. I have been told by my boyfriend that one of my closest and best friends is interested in him. Her sister has contacted my boyfriend and told him of her interest and it was done with the intention of finding out if he could be interested and how the land lies.She told him in strict confidence and asked him to promise that he would not say anything to anyone. He did make that promise but has broken it as he told me. As far as i know,my friend has no idea that she has done this but maybe she does and did actually ask her sister to find out.

My boyfriend has been upfront with me about it but me being me and what has happened to me in the past,i cant help but feel worried and anxious about the whole situation. I have noticed recently that when we are out,she seems to be there more times than not.I dont want history repeating itself but there is so many similarities to what happened in the past. Also he has told me that she texts almost every day for some reason or another.

I do remember her saying to me in a joke that if things went wrong with me and him that she would love a crack at him,we were just having a laugh at the time,well at least that's what i though.

My boyfriend has told me that he has no interest in her but he has always seen her as a friend as they both get on well together. However,last week she asked him if he would go for a coffee with her someday as she has recently had a family death and needs someone to talk to and as he is good at this sort of thing,she would feel better for having that talk. They both told me about this and i was totally ok with this at the time but i know now that this was suggested after he knew of her interest. My God,i am so confused writing this!

He is actually going away for a week next week but it is work related and myself and my friend have arranged a few girls nights out while he is away,oh God i just thought of when i was married and my husband was away,my friend who my husband cheated on me with tried to get me to get with another guy while we were out but i was having none of it as i am not like that.

So to sum it all up,
he knows of her interest and has told me,
she does not know that we both know as her sister asked,
knowing of her interest,he was willing to go for that coffee,
i have no idea what to do now.

Surely it is an unwritten rule that friends dont try it on with their friends other half,this is twice it has happened to me and i dont know what to do,

any advice will be welcomed,

thank you,



  1. unfortunately I do not have much advice to give you treasure ... hugs

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  3. Oh Hollie! I'm so sorry to hear this because obviously it must be very stressful for you based on your past. It is good that he told you but a bit worrying that he was still okay to meet alone with her and texting every day. I assume he texts back? I would have liked to see him cool off contact with her once he knew of her interest because of your past experiences. He must know it would cause you to worry. And what kind of a friend is she? Or her sister? This doesn't sound like a good situation for you at all and one that is going to continue to make you anxious. Take the week without him to think about all of this. How you would d have wanted him to act and react and also to think about your friendship with her. I don't know you in real life but you seem so very sweet and definitely do not deserve to be in this situation. You can control it though. Just remember that. Good luck and a big hug!

    1. thank you so much Ness for your words of encouragement,i really appreciate is so much hun. He actually told me that he replied to her texts as he did not think that she had another agenda and thought she was just being friendly.I am enjoying my week to myself and have alot on my mind but i will be fine xx

  4. Replies
    1. hunni,you are the very best,you are so lovely x

  5. Replies
    1. thank you beautiful lady,you are the best ever x

  6. So sorry to read what have you been through!
    Stay strong!
    Fabrizia - Cosa Mi Metto???

  7. Replies
    1. thank you so much for always being so nice,you brighten up my day,everyday xx

  8. Replies
    1. thank you for always cheering me up sweetie xx

  9. Replies
    1. i honestly cant thank you enough for always putting a smile on my face xx